This blog introduces you to my special brand of BIKE. I show you how to find your Best self, access your Inner strength, tune in to your Killer instincts, and use your Expressive voice. It's inspiring, spiritual, quirky, and it's all in your head. It's about ATTITUDE, not exercise, though that might be a side benefit.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Do you need validation?

After discovering where my name appeared on the Web this morning via two Google Alerts, I asked myself this question this morning: Do I need validation from outside of myself?

Here's what happened: I wrote a story about a fun tour in a small town for a big-time pub (to them). The local small town paper gets wind of the article and writes it up, as both an editorial and as an article. Two different writers quote my article like crazy, use my name, cite the publication, sing all the praises, but not once do I get a call for an interview. Not that I need one. I just thought it was funny.

This particular paper wrote two stories about my one little article. Two stories in the same paper! I'm famous there. It's the third article about my work in this paper. My BF says I could probably be in the town parade. They'd probably name me Homecoming Queen, he says. "There she is! There she is!" he says they'd say. Funny stuff. It made me smile. And, truthfully, it made me feel good--even without the one-on-one interview.

I think we all need to find validation like this outside of ourselves sometimes. We need to know we're appreciated. At the minimum, it's nice to know people notice. We may not do things in order to receive validation. We may just be doing them because the work pays the bills. But it sure is nice to get the recognition afterward.

So, my answer is yes, but it's also no. Feedback is good. It allows us to see where improvements can be made and to continue doing what works. But I don't think we want to rely on it. Because during those times when there is no feedback, when no one does notice you or your work, you could falter. You could succumb to the lack of recognition in some way, maybe even seep into some kind of "Nobody loves me" depression.

If you do that, it's not likely you'll be able to think about improvement, and you won't want to bother doing what you've been doing. You might think, "No one cared, anyway."

This is not a good place to wind up. There's no forward movement there.

So what's your opinion? Do you need validation?

I'd love to hear your thoughts.

2 comments:

Debbie said...

Congrats Jackie on the article and fame that accompanied it! I always enjoy reading comments on the posts I write. It's always nice to get feedback or at least know that someone is reading. But I don't want to count on it. My purpose for writing shouldn't be to get praise or criticism. I want to share what's on my heart and if on occasion, it touches someone else ... I'm happy.

The BIKE Lady said...

That's a good attitude to take. And it is fun to read what others are saying about your work.

It's even nice to get an opposite point of view. It makes you think.

Thanks for continuing to show up here at BIKE WITH JACKIE.

I appreciate your visits.

Jackie