Jenny Sanford will write her memoir

A news report today says Jenny Sanford, the wife of South Carolina governor Mark Sanford, the man who publicly claimed his mistress as his soulmate, will write her memoir. It is scheduled to be released in 2010.

Her focus will be about how one can maintain integrity and a sense of self during troubling times. It will be motivational in tone.

I suspect some will question her judgment about this book, but I don't. After I found out my ex was cheating on me, I knew there were lessons to be learned--and I opened myself up to learning them. Some made me proud. Some made me cringe. And most were soul growth moments. I realized the lessons I needed to learn had very little to do with him and much more to do with me. I, too, am writing a book about this.

I suspect Jenny Sanford has been learning similar lessons. For one: how do you get back up from such a fall? When you're right in the middle of it, it doesn't seem possible at all. Unless you intend to stay down, you quickly learn what you're made of and what you need to do to pick yourself back up. And if you have it in you to push back, you do. You become much more methodical, making choices more carefully, more consciously--and, of course, with dignity, if you have any sense of self left. If not, you dig deep to reconnect.

That's something I've grown to respect about his woman--her dignity shines, from my perspective. When she speaks out, she simply states the truth. She doesn't give her husband any more or any less than he deserves. And she stands tall, because she knows what he did was not about her. For many, that's the hardest lesson to accept...and it may not come quickly. For some, it never does. In this case, I see Jenny Sanford as a reluctant role model--someone, nevertheless, to watch down the road. I see her taking charge of her new role.

She is not a woman who will ever be hiding under the covers.

When faced with the unexpected knowledge that the love of your life, the person who you looked up to, leaned on, and depended on as a source of strength has betrayed you in such a personal way is one of the hardest things, I think, a woman can bear. It knocks you in the gut, over and over again. It does, indeed, make you question your very sense of self.

Ultimately, it can make you stronger. Troubling times, no matter what they are, test your strength, your inner core, your judgment. How you respond to them definitely tests your integrity. Even though I've never met her, I believe her to be a kindred spirit, and I eagerly await Jenny Sanford's take on this topic.

What about you?

More about books...

The list of 12 books I mentioned in yesterday's post was just a small number of books I've read. I have an entire library full of books I read and continue to read during my recovery. For as long as I can remember, I've been drawn to self-help, self-improvement, and memoirs, for example. One of my first was the Rev. Robert H. Schuller's Tough Times Never Last But Tough People Do. The title says it all. There's a lot to learn from other people's challenges. Not to overwhelm my students, however, I kept their list down to 12. It's a start for them. If you'd like to know what my full list is, post a comment. I'd love to hear from you.

Thanks,
Jackie AKA The BIKE Lady