Fueling obsessions

Sometimes, I feel like a stalker of bikes, bicyclists or anything bike-related. I'm obsessed, actually. Anytime I see a bike, anywhere, I take photo of it. If it's possible.

This morning, my friend and I went for a hike in the Phoenix Mountain Preserve, near a place called the Dreamy Draw. She lives nearby, so I met her at her place, and we walked over from there. Somehow, we got off-trail -- Somehow? We weren't paying attention, because we were talking and laughing so much -- and stopped to take some photos of us standing in front of a giant saguaro and the surrounding scenery. Just having a grand old time.

All of a sudden, I saw them coming down another trail and stopped to daydream. I love riding my mountain bike on trails...I wish my friend had a sturdy enough bike for rides like theirs. I got lost in my thoughts for a few seconds. Since my friend still had her camera out, I asked her to take a picture of the two guys coming at us on mountain bikes. She did and sent the above photo to me so I could use it here.

With the desert in the foreground, the riders on the horizon, and that blue sky, I think it's a nice shot. Not clear enough. But nice enough to fuel my obsession.

When the bikers came down the trail and passed us, shouting out a happy hello, you could hear their tires rolling over the rocky terrain. Not too rocky, but a fairly even downhill slope. Not too steep, but enough of a ride to get the adrenalin going. Made me wish I were them.

On the other hand, this picture reminds me that I don't have to just observe. I can do. Tomorrow, I'll go out there for a ride of my own. I'll have to stick to easier terrain, since I'll be on my own, but I'll be out there with my helmet and gloves on, ready to eat some dust.

What do you do to fuel your obsessions?

Immigration and a catch-22

I just overheard a story about a case that's going in front of a judge in criminal court on Monday. It's an immigration issue. Not really a criminal case. The case involves a girl who is 19, an illegal from Mexico. She was brought to the states as a child. Her mother is deceased. Her father out of the picture.

I squeezed my way into the conversation and was told the girl graduated top of her class last year. Should have been a bright student in college by now, working on her career as a lawyer, doctor, or some other great future. Instead, she was arrested (I'm guessing after one of Sheriff Joe Arpaio's immigration stings). She was working as a maid--with a fake ID and Social Security number. The story is, when she graduated high school, she had no money to go to college. She got the fake documents so she could get a job to support herself.

C'mon, folks. She's not a criminal, just a young girl trying to make her way in the world she was brought up in. She doesn't know Mexico. It is not her home. Arizona is. But when she is brought into court on Monday, the judge could sentence her to prison, or he could put her on parole. Regardless, it's a no win for her. The system, as it is, requires young people like her to find a way around it. They have to take the risk of being caught. She did, and she was. Now, she either goes to prison, or she goes back to Mexico--a place she's never called home. If she's sentenced to parole, she'll be immediately transferred over to Immigration, and ICE will keep her locked up in a holding cell until she is deported.

She has no family in Mexico. She doesn't know Mexico. There is no future for her there. Who knows what will happen to her or where she will go, or how she will survive there.

There are so many more similar stories out there like this girl's, and I'd love to interview this one to get to the heart of how poor immigration policies affect the people directly involved. 

From my perspective, this is not a political issue. This is a humanitarian issue. For the kids like this, who had no choice where they were brought up, we need to fix the law. We need to address the kids. As you can see, their futures are at stake.

Just my two cents for a Saturday afternoon.

Photo Essay: remembering Arizona's White Mountains before the Wallow fire

West Baldy Trail near Greer, Arizona

Pine trees in back of Red Setter Inn, Greer

Alpine, Arizona in May 2010

Deer in the meadow across from Molly Butler Lodge, Greer

A quirky character at the old Greer Lodge

Recovery: Celebrating you

I truly believe we are all in Recovery. Every one of us.

Think about it. We've all suffered setbacks. We've all had to deal with trying times. We're all faced with challenges--almost all the time. Most of us would be out of work if this weren't true. Innovation comes from a challenge. New therapies stem from personal dilemmas. Researchers everyday spend time in labs to find the answer to a pressing need. We're all in Recovery. Or maybe that's the way we should be operating, because it implies that you're taking responsibility.

I tell my life stories here at BIKE WITH JACKIE, and they're not always pretty. I do it to let you know that it's okay to be real and raw. I've learned from my own relationships with people who hid who they really were that you can't be intimate with them. You can't trust them. You can't rely on them. And you can't be real with them in return. That's a much larger loss than the eventual breakdown of the relationship itself.

So my mission in life is to help other people get real with their life challenges, to admit them, and then to deal with them, simply because they stop us from moving forward. To accomplish my mission, I teach, sometimes indirectly, how my spiritual navigation tool (the mental BIKE) can be applied to your life. This is briefly explained at the top of this page.

But, basically, I spend time here sharing the lessons I learned from the seat of my bike, lessons that are never-ending. I continue learning new ones, as we all do if we're paying attention, because Recovery IS on-going. It's what we do while we're living life. It's only when we stop living that Recovery ends.

You see, for me, my special brand of BIKE represents rebirth, growth and most especially moving forward.

To do that, I've learned one most important lesson: You must celebrate your successes. Your successes, no matter what they mean to anyone else, are your big deals. They deserve the attention they've earned. And that what's today's post is about: celebrating you, celebrating your successes.

With that, I'd like to announce my most current one:

I just found out my book (pictured above with a goofy grinning me beside it at Barnes & Noble, Kierland Commons, taken by my friend Rebecca A. Allen) is doing so well that I've earned half of my advance already--in just three months!

That's a pretty good track record, folks--one that had my publisher sending me a Royalty Statement a year before I was expecting one. When I opened that letter yesterday, I was pretty darn happy. I know I've been working hard to sell the book, to pitch the book, to get the word out, but I had no idea I was doing that well--not until my publisher told me. So I celebrated. I shared the information with a neighbor, and she popped open a bottle of wine, and we toasted. Then my boyfriend took me out to dinner. And now I'm celebrating here, by sharing the message with you.

Here's why it's so important: Ten years ago, I certainly didn't think I could ever write a book. It would have been too overwhelming a task for me. I know. I tried. I was assigned to do a chapter of a travel guide for a publishing company, and I had to turn the project back in. I had to give up on the job. For personal reasons that were going on in my life that I didn't even know existed, I just couldn't do it.

Clearly, that wasn't the greatest moment in my life. But when I was able to put that behind me and forgive myself that part of my life, the world and all its possibilities opened up again. I began looking for them, seeing them and embracing them. So the travel guide pictured above became yet another symbol. It, too, relates to my BIKE message, which empowers you think differently about yourself. For one thing, you'll be able to recognize when your "tough hill" is ahead, and you'll know you can climb it anyway, because:

You can make mistakes and overcome them.

You can be a better person than you thought you were.

You can do much more than you ever thought you could.

You can choose to associate with people who will help make your dreams come true.

You can change your mind and create new dreams.

You can grow yourself physically, no matter how out of shape you think you are.

You can grow yourself mentally, no matter how doomed you feel.

You can celebrate your successes, because you've earned them.

And your success deserves your respect. It's great when other people celebrate with you, but that's not the important thing. The important thing is that you celebrate you.

So, let me ask you? When was the last time you gave yourself this gift? Write it down here so we can watch you shine.

When was the last time you felt alive?

Sunday--the holy day of rest, to some--seems like a good day to post a few thoughts about feeling alive.

What does it mean?

I remember asking a friend once if she ever just felt really good inside, for no reason. I asked her more specifically if she ever found herself driving down the road and all of a sudden noticing that she was smiling.

I was sad when she responded all too quickly, "No."

There are times when I feel that way frequently. And there are times when I don't feel that way at all. When I don't feel that sense of aliveness, I know that's when I'm too focused on work or something that's not going right in my life. I'm tuned in to the outside world rather than the inside.

But I'm really glad I notice when that smile appears.

I'm glad that I have the ability to recognize that.

It's happening in my life right now. I feel alive again. I've been so focused on my book project that I've neglected to maintain a sense of balance. I don't regret it, because I was accomplishing something I really wanted to do, and I knew it would require a sacrifice on my part. Someone told me after I announced that I'd finished my book that I should be careful now, that I should be sure to maintain the pace I've been keeping, because I could fall into depression if I'm not careful. My mind's become used to working, I guess, is this person's theory. So if I let it relax a little too much, I might feel a void.

But I don't feel a void. I feel free. I feel like I can get back to doing things I've missed doing while the book was my main focus. I feel alive.

I know this is true for several reasons. When I was in the midst of my divorce and focused solely on that, my senses were numbed. I didn't feel much of anything except anxiety. But I do know the exact moment when that numbness began to lift. On one occasion, I was out with friends at a favorite hang-out. We were sipping glasses of chardonnay when a man walked by our table. Instantly, I smelled his cologne. I couldn't help myself when I reached out toward him. Before I knew it, I had grabbed his neck toward my nose so I could take in that scent. It smelled so new and good and strong. I asked him, of course, if I could smell--and smell again--and he obliged.

He also took it the wrong way. I wasn't coming on to him, as he suspected. I was merely regaining my sense of smell and recognized it. I was thrilled and didn't want the moment to pass me by. I wanted to take it all in, and I did. My friend was aghast and told me I definitely needed a chaparone when I went out; she was not going to let me go out alone. Not ever! I laughed at her assessment of what just happened, and I got it. But I don't think she really understood the giddyness I felt during this moment of recognition. It was the beginning of my reawakening to all of life's possibilities. I'm forever grateful I recognized it.

It happened again to me this past week. After several months of being cooped up in my office with nothing more than the pile of notes, books, and other papers needed to complete my book--and a computer--I didn't realize how numb I'd become to the outside world until I went back out there. My first outing turned out to be a spontaneous visit to the Farmer's Market on Wednesday afternoon. I arrived and immediately went to the vegetable stands and bought apples, grapes, tomatoes, big thick carrots, and a few other colorful veggies to take home and make a salad with that afternoon.

Then I proceeded to walk around to see what else was for sale. I stopped at the soap booth. A woman was selling fresh soaps that she'd made herself in her own kitchen. Before I knew it, I was picking up each and every scented soap and sticking it to my nose. Smelling. I found a scent that I adored and couldn't put the soap down. I was laughing. I was talking out loud to myself. I was enjoying every minute with these hand-made soaps. And I bought quite a few to take home so I could continue the silly excess. I even bought something for my neighbor who'd been taking good care of me in my last few weeks of work on the book. I was in heaven with these soaps. It was just like that moment in the bar with the man and his cologne and my nose in his neck.

But that's what it means to be alive. You notice things with your five senses. You can smell better, see more clearly, observe more closely, hear things louder, feel textures. You pay attention to things you may have ignored before...the birds chirping in the trees, the way the wind makes the branches on a tree sway back and forth, the cologne on a strange man's neck . You feel a sense of joy, and it's unexplainable. You smile about nothing in particular while driving down the road in your car, or sitting on the bus, or walking from room to room in your house.

It's something that comes from the inside. You can't force it. It just shows up when you're ready.

When was the last time you felt like that? Post a comment about it here so the rest of us can be sure to recognize when it's happening. It could be right this very minute.

All my best,
Jackie

Blogathon near its end

Only two more days till the Blogathon ends.

It's been a fun challenge to see if I can handle a post a day for one entire month. Time will tell if I can. I nearly missed it today, though, because I took a day trip for my travel guide project and didn't get home till after 8 p.m. I went back to Miami-Globe, Ariz., to visit with an independent book store owner and to see if I could climb 150 concrete stairs like the miners used to do in late 1800s to early 1900s. I couldn't. By the time I got to the stairs, it was after 2 p.m., and about 100 degrees outside. I also met a saddle maker, a boutique owner, and if there had been more time in the day, I'd have done several more site visits. The people were lovely and shared wonderful stories about their lives in these small, nearly abandoned mining towns.

I wound up getting some nice pictures of the stairs, a few shops, the mission-style Catholic church in Miami with the stained glass windows and several other things. I also met a gallery owner fairly new in town who promised to host me for a book signing next year. I told him he could pair that with a show of travel photography. I know plenty who might be interested. How cool is that?! Remember the post about asking and receiving.

Oh, and the book store owner said she'd do the same. What sweethearts. I'm glad I went back.

Even if the trip almost cost me a perfect record. Oh, wait! I still have those two more days...

Happy reading,
Jackie

Speaking of spirituality

Check out my story about the spiritual side of Sedona in the May issue of Arizona Highways. Remember I'd mentioned I went there last May looking for those mysterious vortexes, to find out what exactly they are and what exactly they do.

I spent a lot of time with a guy who goes by the name of Mr. Sedona. Nice guy. I'd read his book, What is a Vortex? And I wanted to know more. He was kind enough to show me places I never even dreamed about. The wonderful thing about Arizona is that the mountains that you see have many layers. The outside layers, the ones you see from the side of a road or from a distance, make lovely landscapes. But inside those canyon walls awaits mystery, suspense and amazing beauty. It reminds me of abundant opportunity...and also of the famous phrase Forest Gump recites, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get." It's true. Inside those canyon walls, you never know what you'll see. If you go in the early morning hours, you'll view something different than if you visit at dusk. If you travel there with friends who've been before, the trip will be quite differnt than one you might take with novice Sedona tourists. I'll be going back for another visit soon and am already wondering what my experience will bring me this time. Will I hear sounds from the couple who came to start a drum circle meeting? They were on their way in as I was leaving last time. I would have liked to have sat around and listened. Perhaps they would have loaned me a drum, and I could have found a comfortable beat to tap into while sitting on the red sandstone. Anything could happen.

This next trip I take there will net stories for a chapter in my travel guide book. It's part of my plan to live the life I want, and that includes writing, travel, speaking.

Are you living the life you want?

Today, start thinking about that. Start thinking about the way you organize your time, the work that you do, and the people you surround yourself with on a regular basis.

Are you living the life you want?

If not, what steps can you take today to ensure yourself the life that you deserve?

It took me more than 40 years to understand I had the power to make these choices and not just fall into a pattern of what I thought others expected of me. Not only that, but it took me a long time to recognize I had to be willing to accept the power. It's one thing to understand free will. It's quite another to know what it can do for you and to act on it in a positive way.

But now I know it doesn't matter how long it took me to get here. It's good that I am.

You don't have to walk on eggshells just because someone else in your life is unhappy. You don't have to accept the judgements that others might make of you. You don't have to buy into anyone else's expectations of what you should do, be or say. When you do that, you minimize the personal power you have to be your true self.

Today, take a stand.

Begin the steps today that will lead you to your very own happiness. If you don't know what that is exactly, you first may need to determine the definition for yourself. It's okay. This isn't a one-day-only gig. No need to worry that you don't have the answers yet. None of us do. They will arrive when you're ready to accept them. You'll know you've found a good path when the momentum carries you forward. You'll feel the positive energy.

Getting to know who you are at your core--getting in touch with your mental BIKE--is about trusting yourself. Maybe for the very first time in your life. It's about becoming self-aware. The best life you can life for yourself is a conscious one. It means you take responsibility for who you are, what you do, and where you go.

That involves life-long learning, and your answers will change with your growth. That's a good thing. Be open to the possibilities. Let your own spirituality speak for itself. That means trust your gut.

To allow growth to occur, however, you do need to take the steps. There is no forward movement if you don't take the steps.

So here's an exercise for you:

Try writing down on a piece of paper, in a notebook, or in your journal if you have one five things that have crossed your mind in the last year that you thought you might like to do. You're simply experimenting with ideas. They can be outrageously unlikely. They can be superficial. They can be anything you think they are. But don't judge them enough that you discount them. The more outrageous the better. This is an exercise about looking at the possibilities that await you. If you have more than five ideas, write them down. A possibility, by its own definition, is limitless.

Do this during your lunch hour, after dinner, or before you go to bed tonight, and then enjoy the rest of your week!

All my best,
The BIKE Lady