Ted Turner wisdom

I wouldn't say I'm a fan of Ted Turner, but I dated a guy in college who admired him greatly. That admiration had a lot to do with the fact that they both had ties to Atlanta. I wound up marrying this college sweetheart of mine (He later died.), and I've always noticed anything said or written about Ted Turner since. It's not anything I purposefully look for, but when he appears on TV or on a magazine cover, I can't help but notice. Perhaps it's simply because the guy reminds me of my late husband; they share the same hairline and color , color of eyes, and that dimple on the chin...

This morning, Ted Turner appeared on NBC's "Meet the Press"--I WAS a big fan of Tim Russert's!--and I watched. Discussing with Tom Brokaw a former rift with Rupert Murdock, Turner said about their reconciliation: "It hurts you when you don't like someone; it doesn't really hurt them."

It hurts you when you don't like someone; it doesn't really hurt them.

That's a line worth repeating. It made me stop and think. There are people in my life who I haven't really liked, and I've experienced my fair share of rifts. Turner's insightful words made me immediately think, Who cares? Who really cares? They don't.

So what's the point? He's basically saying, "Let it go."

Let it go.

Three more words worth repeating, again and again.

Can you think of a rift in your life that needs to be discarded? If you're being your Best self, you'll find a way to admit there probably is such a rift, and you'll figure out how you can let it go. Not for them, but for you. It means you recognize where you can make improvements in your life, and that you will take the steps to do that. It may take time--and the letting go part doesn't have to involve that other person directly--but you know you have the power of choice. You'll rely on your Inner strength to remove the shame or doubt that surfaces. You'll trust your Killer instincts to take the necessary action. And you'll use your Expressive voice to say what might need to be said or to simply reach out in whatever way will move you forward.

Here at BIKE WITH JACKIE, it's always about forward movement. That's our goal with this mental bike ride. Whatever's holding you back, whether or not it's a rift, together we look for ways to get beyond the struggles, which can come at us so unexpectedly. We know we're not in this alone. Thankfully, if we're open to improvement, we'll gain the insights or epiphanies needed--even if they come from a TV personality.

Shopping frenzy or farce

It's hard to believe what happened yesterday on "Black Friday." But I'm sure you heard about it: a Wal-Mart temp was trampled at the door while thousands of shoppers rushed inside for the sales!

It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase.

If a man hadn't died, the scene might be called comical. But it's been billed by some people who were there an "accident." This was no accident. I'm not sure what you'd call it, but accident is not the word.

Can you imagine being a part of this frenzy, this over-sized crowd of shoppers, trying to get inside a Wal-Mart of all places? For what? Can anything you might ever wish to buy at a discount store--or anywhere else, for that matter--be worth the cost of a man's life?

How could anyone who participated in this chaos justify their behavior? I can't imagine how I'd feel if I'd gotten caught up in that. No apology could right this wrong.

I would say this is why I avoid shopping on Black Friday, as they call the busiest shopping day of the holiday season. But that wouldn't be true. For one thing, I've never heard anything like this happen before. And for another, I've gone shopping many times on the day after Thanksgiving. Just never seriously. I'm not the biggest fan of shopping. I can enjoy it. I can engage in it for many hours at a time. But I've never felt the need to buy a gift for anyone--no, not even my kids--that would require standing in lines overnight or anything that would even come close to putting me in a crowd such as the one that must have been standing outside the door of that Wal-Mart in Long Island yesterday.

Maybe those who were there will now think twice about the importance of owning a material item. It's just not that important. A man's life was taken. That's all that matters in this story. A man was knocked down and trampled on till he could no longer breathe life. And now he's gone. He and his family and friends were robbed of his life. That's all that matters.

An innocent man was killed.

And what about the people who killed him? The gifts they brought home...what meaning do they have left? How do you explain to your young son or your husband or your mother, "Oh, I waited in line all night to get this for you. I even knocked down a man to get this for you. He died so I could get this for you. I hope you appreciate it."

Merry Christmas?

I can't imagine.

After dinner transition

The turkey's put away. The dishes cleaned. The dining room back in order. Family's gone home or back to the hotel. Now what? That after dinner transition can be an unsettling time for some. Your mind has taken you to this high-energy place and kind of wants to stay there, where it's fun and exciting, but the next day--after that big dinner and all the company that comes with it for the Thanksgiving meal--can feel pretty, well, blah.

For some people, this can move into a slight depression, the post-holiday blues, I've heard it called.

To avoid this, what kinds of things do you do to keep the holiday moving forward and the momentum going through to the end of the year? With our economy in a flux, that may seem difficult to think about. Worries about bank accounts and jobs and relationships may be trying to move in on your inner peace. But you can take charge of how you perceive the holiday season. You can decide it will be stressful, or you can decide it won't. You can let the rush seem maddening, or you can simply slow things down. Even when life seems out of control, as it may today, you still have choices about how you interpret what's happening to you.

After my holiday meal yesterday, I overheard friends talking about getting together the next evening--today--for card games in the evening. They were making plans to extend the fun, so that it all didn't just end so abruptly. I kind of liked that idea. It was simple, inviting, and would involve an all-age crowd--no one had to be left out.

I'll be going to a football game myself.

Another friend and his family will attend Glendale Glitters--one city's special event that involves a tree lighting display.

So it seems, as with most things, planning things to do can be a real life saver. It can help you move your thoughts to more positive places.

To keep the momentum going--especially when, as in my case, I couldn't have all of my family together this year--I've decided to spend the rest of the weekend decorating, even though I won't likely see guests in my house this Christmas, either. It'll help remind me that the season is here, that celebrating is a choice. And maybe I'll create a few spontaneous get-togethers, which is always a fun thing to do.

So what are you doing to keep the momentum going, to keep the spirit of the holidays alive? Are you going to church or other religious service? Are you listening to holiday music? Are you planning to map out the homes with holiday lights and visit them?

Are you PLANNING to enjoy the holidays?

Think about that, and if you if you have a few holiday ideas to share, I hope you'll post them here.

An addition to my Blogroll

I've never thought about doing this till today, but it makes sense to me for some reason (I can see clearly now?)...But I thought I'd announce from here on out when I add a new blog to my Blogroll, you know, to introduce you.

Today, I've added the Crystle Ball to the list. Owned by Chrystle Fiedler, author of the soon-to-be-released, The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Natural Remedies, this blog will focus on mainstream and alternative health, as well as self-help topics. And since Chrystle writes about the mind-body connection, which we talk about a lot here, I thought she'd be a good fit. Plus, she's a colleague of mine from FreelanceSuccess.com, which I refer to frequently as well, and you can't go wrong with these folks.

If you want to take a look at the other blogs on the list, they're on the left-hand side of the page, under the title, "Blogs that make you go ummmm."

The bike route to freedom

Remember the Underground Railroad--that secret path that was once used by slaves to escape to freedom? This part of American history has been preserved by way of a bike path--a 2,028-mile bike path that takes the rider along the same route American slaves took before and during the Civil War.

The path follows secret routes and safe houses used by the "freedom seekers" who dared to risk their lives to escape slavery. The Underground Railroad Bicycle Route, as it's called today, takes the rider past points of interest and historic sites between Alabama and Ontario, where the free slaves created a settlement in 1857.

If this isn't one of the better reasons to ride a bike--to learn and live this history, and see for yourself what it means to overcome--I don't know what is. Not only can the power behind the pedal lead to good physical and mental health, but it can teach you first-hand what it means to become free of your bondage--however that may be defined.

To me, this path is so symbolic of what our trials and tribulations in life can do to us. Yes, they can chain us down, but faith proves there's always a way out. With faith, you find a way. And this bike path testifies to the power behind that faith. It may take physical power, such as pedaling a bike for as long as it takes to reach your destination, but if you believe in yourself, faith says you'll get there.

I'd love to do this tour some day.

Recently, the groups that created this adventurous ride, Adventure Cycling and the Center for Minority Health, received an award at the National Trails Symposium. To that, I say congratulations!