tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post8529488212307922231..comments2023-06-01T08:48:30.536-07:00Comments on BIKE WITH JACKIE: When is it okay to gossip?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09505661913107994459noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post-37452225402780827162009-06-21T06:28:23.553-07:002009-06-21T06:28:23.553-07:00Being honest with yourself, Anonymous, is the firs...Being honest with yourself, Anonymous, is the first step to learning more about who you are and who you want to be. It also makes room for others in your life to do the same.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09505661913107994459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post-30258536387009416032009-06-21T05:15:59.127-07:002009-06-21T05:15:59.127-07:00Great (and very honest)post, Jackie.Great (and very honest)post, Jackie.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post-80294488103365139062009-06-21T05:15:56.347-07:002009-06-21T05:15:56.347-07:00Jennifer,
Yes, you're right about the study, ...Jennifer,<br /><br />Yes, you're right about the study, and I definitely think there is a distinction, and it has to do with motivation, I think. What's your motivation about sharing this information? In my case, I was wrong, and I was upset with myself for it. <br /><br />Maybe if we spent more time asking ourselves that--how do you feel about yourself?--we'd become more aware. If what you're saying goes against your personal value system, I think you'll know it, as long as you're clear on what your value system is.<br /><br />It's not easy being your Best self every day. We are going to be influenced in many ways--both internally and externally. And it's important to stay in tune. I think I have some personal tuning to take care of. <br /><br />By the way, I would have made the announcement that you did as well. <br /><br />JackieAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09505661913107994459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post-76221058321978055732009-06-20T18:03:41.581-07:002009-06-20T18:03:41.581-07:00Looking at the "gossip is good" study, i...Looking at the "gossip is good" study, it seems that they looked at gossip as sharing personal information, not sharing personal information about OTHERS. I think that's a huge and crucial difference.<br /><br />That said, though, I'd say it's OK to gossip -- and I'm not even sure I'd call it gossip -- when one person is sharing something about a mutual friend, that they know the mutual friend would be OK with sharing. For instance: A couple days ago, a friend told me that another friend was struggling with some personal issues. And today -- on Facebook, even -- I announced that a friend's mother had died, so that her friends (many of whom are on my list) could give her support.Jennifer Finkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10568576650343979230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post-90171078652957855822009-06-20T12:21:23.488-07:002009-06-20T12:21:23.488-07:00I love that--tattle to God! Great idea.I love that--tattle to God! Great idea.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09505661913107994459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-792745986850454057.post-9455644328390581672009-06-20T12:06:56.602-07:002009-06-20T12:06:56.602-07:00Jackie, you said it ...after all, we're human....Jackie, you said it ...after all, we're human. But I hate gossip! And I find it's so easy to get caught up in it when other women are doing it. I find though that I really don't like to be around people who gossip on a regular basis. I'm sure we all have some of those people we know. <br /><br />I think it's great that you owned up to the fact that it was wrong to gossip in this instance about your ex. When people have wronged us somehow it seems OK to do. I know I've often had all the rationalizations as to why it was OK. But in reality it's not.<br /><br />For me, what has been helpful is to know that the other person really isn't getting away with the bad behavior just because I may chose to forgive. After all, they have to answer to a higher authority than me one day. And the other thing I now do is ...tattle to God. It may sound silly but just by verbalizing my anger about an injustice aloud to God helps me. He already knows about it but it's therapeutic for me and then I no longer feel the need to call up my friends to share the latest.Debbie Petrashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08235978883396499354noreply@blogger.com